Coming out

Bratislava, 8.th June 2006


My sister just got married. We' re sitting at a long table in our favorite family restaurant. My two sisters, the new husband, his family, our parents and their best friends and all the friends. My parent's best friend's son, Bruno, is under the table trying to open my pants and blow me out...I'm doing my best trying to stop him without my mom noticing.

Suddenly, Bruno's father, rather drunk, stands up and hits the table with his fist.
"Do you realize what you've done? All this is because of you. It's your fault if my son became this disgusting thing. Your son spoiled him!"
He was addressing my mom. I didn't really get what he was meaning. Bruno seemed to understand as his head hit the table after he suddenly straightened up. While he crawled from under the table, my mom would light a cigarette and kindly ask:
"Whatever is that drunk man talking about?"
He would point his finger at Bruno pulling himself together:
"This, they're together!"
My mom would still not get it. My father would go from white to green and successively to purple. My sister would lead all the guests to the next room, as somehow she saw the storm was coming.
"They're gay, they didn't tell you? The other day, Bruno came to me all happy, talking about how they met again in London, the flame lit up, now they're coming back to Bratislava with Rolland to have a life together...Oh, I'm sick of it. I'm pretty sure you're happy, Helen."
Helen, my mom, would drop the cigarette out of shock. She simply whispered:
"That can't be..."
Her girlfriend watched her with surprise:
"How can you say that? We're a lesbian couple, why couldn't your son be gay?"
There comes my father with a few words:
"My only son is gay?"
By that time his wife would be filling him up with some pills to calm him down. She used to be his nurse at the hospital after he had a nervous break down when my mother came out two years ago.
My mom went back to normal, smoking on her cigarette:
"You see Peter, the problem is, your son can't be gay..."
There, I break in tears with misunderstanding :
"Mom, how can you be so harsh? I thought you would understand, I didn't even feel like needing to tell you. I'm confused!"
"Of course you're confused. See, the problem Rolland, my son, is not that you're gay. But that you're dating your brother."
"How could he be my brother. Mom, what are you talking about?"
"Well, to clear things up. I'm sorry you all have to learn this now. Well Peter, remember the one night you would go all around the town looking after me and I was nowhere to be found? Actually,  I spent that one March 85' night just upstairs from our flat with Stefan, Bruno's father and nine months later Rolland was born. Get it?"
I was too afraid to understand. Bruno held my hand so tight he almost cracked it  into pieces. My father would fall to the floor instantly secured by his wife. This would mean he had no sons... No sons of our knowledge at least.
My mom was smoking, her girlfriend would be caressing her back in a kind but puzzled way. Bruno's father would finally shut up and sit down. I felt his look for a while, but I would not give in to the need to watch my genetic father. I knew him too well.
Finally, I managed to look at Bruno. My eyes were dry and empty now, his eyes were wet. Huge teardrops would be falling down his face and his cherry lips were shaking like if you took a candy from a five year old. Nevertheless, he would still be fixing me. I didn't know if I should kiss him or push him away, so I just held his hand tighter and tried to give it a go with a fake smile.
Bruno's mom would stand up, talking to her husband:
"So you slept with that slut twenty years ago, just as I was pregnant with Bruno and you would keep it for yourself? You're all sick!"
My mom felt offended, well she was offended, wasn't she?
"That slut? I thought we were best friends for nearly 30 years!"
"Best friends my ass, you lost me the day you smoked pot on Rolland's first birthday. Me, I'm a good person, I will not tolerate sick sinners in my surrounding. I'm fed up with you all. I will not tolerate neither of these Satan's boys. Neither yours neither Peter's. Sick couple!!!"
After swallowing a respectful amount of painkillers, cheer-ups and brown rum, my father would finally react:
" I'm sorry Irena, but one of those boys is yours and none is mine. "
"Oh, you mean you forgot? The one night together..."
Now Irena, Bruno's mom would have the attention of the rest of us.
"Yes, you all, I'm a slut, I sinned, and God punished me with a gay bastard son. Yes Peter, Bruno is your son!"
"So my only son is gay!" my father, I mean Peter, would break in tears now, even the painkillers couldn't hold-in that one.
"Yes, it's a God's punishment!"
 My mum would roll her eyes:
"Irena, since when would you be such a good christian, you were a communist since forever."
"I was hiding my faith in the interest of my family, nobody would show his belief in God in communism."
"Of course they would, and they would get punished by the communist system.  So actually you were a closeted christian raising a closeted gay bastard."
"Mom, you're insulting my boyfriend."
"Oh please, you're a bastard too!"
There, both of us laughed out loud with relief : 
"At least we're not blood brothers, and that's okay with our God."
I grabbed Bruno's arms and fix his eyes full of tears and confusion with my eyes full of smiling hope.
"Now is the time to move. We've heard enough. We can go free!"
Bruno wiped his tears, took my hand and started running. As we passed by my newly wed sister we wished her and her husband luck, she wished us the same.
We ran outside, we ran for a few miles toward the banks of Danube river where we fell into the grass, kissed passionately and started a wildly happy life.

The end